In Conclusion...

Here is the first picture I ever put on one of my blogs,
I'm nine months pregnant and still skinnier now 

In two days I will be 36 weeks or nine months pregnant and in two days I will be officially done with my second year of college. This semester has honestly been the scariest semester of my entire life. I went into this semester with a lot of people disappointed with me and my decisions and a lot of people doubting I would make it to this final week. Not only do I have to do well for my future but there's going to be a little girl in a month (hopefully less) that I have to be successful for as well. It's been a long semester and I am excited to spend my summer break with my daughter and get my life started.

One thing I was so concerned with when I was entering college was like falling in love and settling down for the rest of my life and 2 years later I'm still awkward and not really sure how relationships and love works and I haven't made much progress. For sure one thing I've learned in college is college  boys usually sit next to the girls with less clothes and not the girl who whispers all of the answers under her breathe and refuses to raise her hand. So I am very sorry to everyone that after two years this is the only "relationship" advice I can give you: Don't read my previous sentence and think that in order to get a boys attention you'll need to wear less clothes because college boys aren't that worth it anyway. They all smell weird anyway.

And this is just my great grandma and I (Delilah's
GREAT GREAT grandma), this picture is
here just because I'm obsessed with her.

Secondly I've learned to never take shit from people. As a young adult in our society I, like my peers, get looked down a lot simply because of my age and supposed "inexperience". One solid example is the way people react to me being 19 and pregnant, they immediately think I'm irresponsible and basically an idiot. I have to politely defend myself constantly because yes I made one questionable decision but I am also a 19 year old who lives in a 2 bedroom condo by herself who pays her own bills and supports herself and has a financially stable life set for her daughter while also going to school on time and making a name for herself. And I have to conclude with "what were YOU doing when you were 19?". Many people underestimate the power we as young adults have and all that we  can do and I want anyone who ever reads this to know that they can do anything and amount to anything they set their mind to. And thats super cliche but it's honestly the truth because if anyone would have told me two years ago the kind of person I would end being today I would have laughed. 

I just thought this was funny, my last
conclusion cat picture

Those aren't the only things I have learned in the last two years but it's two things I would always keep in mind. SBCC has provided with so much life experience and has helped me grow so much as a student and as a human being. I wouldn't change anything about the last two years of my life here and I cannot wait to come back in the fall as an official mom and work on taking my education to the next (university) level. SBCC has provided me with the best opportunities through blogging, tutors, and wonderful professors. 

XOXO

Ashley

P.S. If you ever miss me you can read old blogs from the Fall 2014 semester, Spring 2015 semester and this semester. If you want to follow my life after this and see baby pics then you can do that here.

Hiatus

I took a short(ish) break from blogging and most of civilization, my friend count went from 3 to 2 in the last month because I've been so MIA. I'm alive and well again and a teeny bit behind in school and work from my bed rest. I know that being on bed rest sounds like I had plenty of time to do homework and blog and get things done but unfortunately when you have an untreatable stomach virus along with a very active baby not a lot of moving or eating can get done. 

Since I last spoke or typed to all of you my stomach finally popped out and I look like an actual pregnant person. Just yesterday my doctor told me to "cool it on the eating", I may have gone a bit overboard once I was allowed to eat food again. Little does my doctor know that I have zero self control and a very cool baby shower being thrown this weekend. An update on the pregnancy is that my baby is not taking after me and she is huge and almost as long as I was when I was born. She'll be hitting seventeen inches within the next week and I was born at eighteen. I will be 33 weeks tomorrow (8 months), so I have seven more weeks of accidentally peeing my pants at work. 

School wise I wish I didn't get so behind from being sick but I'm caught up for the most part and so far it looks like I'm going to finish up the semester before Delilah decides to be released into the world. This is the second time I've had an online class and I've officially learned my lesson and will stay away from those. Online classes weren't meant for people who constantly forget everything. If I was more organized and grown up I would for sure ace online classes but sadly I'm slightly immature and a huge mess so they haven't worked out for me. If the last three sentences made you relate to me in any sort of way then please don't take online classes either, it probably won't work out. Aside from the discouragement if you are like me but you are very sure you'll be able to handle work online then try one class in the fall and see how you do.

Mercy doesn't want to be a big sister

I promise I won't be disappearing again any time soon so please look out for something in the next couple of days. Until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

P.S. I am so obsessed with my maternity photos so sorry you'll probably be seeing more of them.

Monkeying Around

Pre-Zoo Selfie

This last week I outdid myself. I worked 52 hours, aced a midterm, and finished my zoo project for anthropology. After coming home at the end of it all Sunday I crashed, well until I had to wake up for work the next morning at 3 am. Besides that one of the less stressful days of my week was the day I went to the zoo. I called my brother in law since he's been home with the kids and invited him to come along. My sister decided to invite herself along last minute so the five of us went to go study the monkeys.

I think every anthropology class ever does this project, my sister goes to CSUCI and she did almost the same exact project a couple of semesters though. It's like an universal anthropology standard to study primates. We had to study different aspects including locomotion, social interactions, resting, etc but none of the primates were doing anything. Like we spent three hours watching them sit there and stare at us. Most of the things I was supposed to be studying were unobservable, and it made me feel like I wasn't doing the project correctly. We were supposed to do three 20 minute observations, I started with the gorilla and all I saw was the first 30 minutes was him lazily groom his shoulder for like 5 minutes and the rest was just sitting and occasionally turn him head. The other gorilla was sleeping the entire time so I didn't get much from him either. Fun fact about the gorilla they pee for a reallllllyyyyyy long time. 

Besides my useless observations I had a lot of fun with my nephews looking at the other animals. My nephew Dj, whom I share many pictures of on here, hung out with me the entire time. My stomach gets in the way of everything and I get more tired than usual so it was hard to hold him as much as I usually would. He kept asking me a million questions and had a lot of fun looking at the animals. Spending time with him at the zoo made me excited to get to do those kind of things with my own daughter someday. 

Update: I went in for my 6 month checkup and I have gained no more than the 1.5 pounds I gained in January and the baby is perfect. She kicks all the time but never lets anyone besides me, the cats and sometimes my mom feel her. You can read my last blog post here and until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

P.S. I think I'm done with cats, this little fox was so cute!

I Chased a Guy

I did something a couple weeks ago, and I don't know whether it's beneficial to me or not but I chased my philosophy teacher across the bridge. I think I scared him because he kept looking back at me with a weird expression on his face but he didn't say anything. But since I have a human inside of me, I wasn't exactly running after him. I was more waddling as fast as I could to keep up with him. This shouldn't come as surprising behavior since I do strange things all the time. I thought I was going to be late for class but I ran into him on the bridge, he was talking to another student and since he probably didn't recognize me since I never speak I wasn't surprised that he ignored me. He's a tall guy so he naturally is quicker than me, I stared at him the entire walk to class because I was so intent on keeping up with him and he looked a bit frightened. I would be frightened too if a tiny pregnant girl was staring at me and waddling behind me for ten minutes. I decided that I had creeped him out enough and went in a different door than him but I still sat in the second row and continued to stare at him (academically speaking) for another hour. Either he thinks I'm stalking him OR he thinks I was trying to ease drop on his academic conversation, which I did.

In honor of leap year

Now this all happened the day before I ended in the hospital, before anyone freaks out I'm okay and my baby is okay. I'm just sore and tired and that's not really anything new. I just had some pressure and pain that I had never experienced before and all the results were inconclusive so they sent me home. They ruled some stuff out and told me to basically get over it unless it gets worse. Academically this put me behind a day and I have since caught up and even managed to ace a psychology test after missing our final lecture on the test material. 

I am not an organized adult, I am generally organized but the whole adult part doesn't really fit in. Something I am learning and will hopefully be good at by the time my daughter is born is balance. Right now my life is nowhere near balanced. I procrastinate homework to catch up on sleep and then try to leave work as quickly as possible at the end of the week to catch up on homework I put off to sleep Mon-Thurs. The most social time I get is hanging out with my mom and of course my cats. 

Everyone needs a cat picture to destress their lives

Generally speaking I think that balance is something all college students deal with, some more than others. And if anyone reads this and has some tips on balancing my life, you can comment and let me know; my pregnancy app says I need to be more open to advice and suggestions so please let me know!! You can read my last blog post here and until next time!

XOXO 

Ashley

Library 101

I'm turning into one of those people

Anyone at SBCC has probably taken this class or its equivalent (English 120). If you haven't take either of these then you most likely will before you graduate or transfer. I'm taking this class because I didn't pass it my first semester while in English 110. Library 101 is one unit course that lasts six weeks. It mainly focuses on information research and how we can apply these skills in real life and in the classroom.

I would consider myself a good researcher already but this class has helped me develop these skills further. One thing I could NOT do before was a works cited. I would literally skip it in high school and make sure the written portion of my grade was high enough to make up for these lost points. Obviously this is unavoidable in college. A great resource that I use for citations is Purdue OWL, it can help you write the correct citation in the correct format for literally everything. I learned about this website my first semester and I've lived by it, I always double check my citations with the help of this site. This is probably the most helpful thing I've gotten out of this class.

She likes to judge me from afar

Honestly this class can be tedious but it's only six weeks long and it really benefits you in the long run. It gives you the information you'll need later in college and it's better to learn now than to struggle later. I wish it was a on campus class just because I personally do better in the classroom but the cool thing is all the librarians are experts on this stuff so if you ever get stuck there's people there and ready to help you.

Don't procrastinate like I did, this isn't a class you should have to take twice. 

Update: I just hit 6 months and I just really want to sleep. You can read my previous blog post here and until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

Life Skills

I taught myself something new today and I am very proud of myself. This newfound skill is shaking and feeding myself a baby bottle pop with one hand and typing and continuing my work with the other. Nothing says professional adult like a bright blue mouth.  It's been rough the last few months teaching myself how to eat properly while working. I enjoy eating so much that I have walked around work trying to get from one place to another eating a bowl of cereal because I didn't want to stop eating. My bosses have walked in on more than cereal though, I get caught with tacos, BLT's, various Mexican food, and other random things I snag off the shelves.

The hardest part about my class times  being so close together is that I don't have enough time to eat as much as I want to. I run into the cafeterias at the busiest times and I usually eat my food in line while waiting to pay. I was embarrassed the first time but I'm so used to it now. The only thing that gets me through it is "well my pants are already unbuttoned I can't get any lower than that". Hopefully that doesn't get me arrested or something, no one has noticed that part yet. 

Another inconvenience is that I can't eat in my classes because of the type of classrooms I am in. In previous semesters I could get away with it because my teachers were more lenient. I tried eating in my Anthropology class the other day and I missed the whole concept of p^2+2pq+q^2=1 and there are parts on my homework the I have been staring at since Thursday. If anyone has tips on this part of Anthro 101 then plleeeasseee tell me. I've obviously learned my lesson on not paying more attention to donuts than lectures. 

Update: I'm on week 23 (6 months on Tuesday!!!) and I feel like she's moving all the time. Anyone who has seen me in real life knows that I'm pretty small vertically but my daughter is surprising long and larger than she is supposed to be so that should be interesting in 14 years when she outgrows me. 

Always watching, always judging

I am almost finished with my Library 101 class and I'm going to cover it next week so please look out for that. You can read my latest blog here and until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

My First D

I took my first Psychology test today, and I for sure got at least a D on it. I definitely didn't fail but I know that I didn't do as well as I could have. The test was based on chapters one, two, and three but I feel like it weighed heavily on chapter three. That just so happen to be the chapter I didn't understand, brain anatomy and functions just isn't my forté. I'm hoping that with more studying and work with the tutor I can improve in this class because doing well is really important to me. There are quite a few of extra credit opportunities available and one of them happens to be this Thursday in the CLRC. It's a note taking strategies workshop. Although I think I'm good at taking notes already, I think there is always room for improvement. I think it would be a great workshop to stop by so if anyone is on campus Thursday at 1 p.m. you should stop by. 

Now that I'm in week 4 I've started to get into a homework/sleep routine. I try to go to sleep as close to 7pm as possible. But sometimes work takes a long time to finish and I don't get home until 8 or 9 so homework has to come before sleep. No matter what time I go to sleep I wake up exhausted because I'm always so uncomfortable. I'm just waiting to get so exhausted that I'll be in a dead sleep and actually get a full nights rest. 

Balancing work and school is definitely a challenge

and it's sometimes harder than it needs to be especially with tests and projects. If you like a challenge then I would definitely go for it, but I would recommend a part time job that doesn't interfere with school. My job doesn't necessarily interfere but I do have at least 40 hours of work a week that I have to keep up with too. Work and school is a topic I've kept consistent in my blogs so I hope that my experiences with it can help you guys out too.

Now onto the serious business, it's almost time for baseball. I am so excited to have the privilege of delivering a baseball season baby. I can't wait to take her to Dodger games and show her baseball butts from the beginning of her time. I think it could be something we bond over together and I hope it's that thing that will always keep us close. Fun Fact: If I were to have had a boy he would have been named after Zack Greinke and Adrian Gonzalez. Although it is a girl, I still refer to her as baby Greinke because I think Zack and Adrian can play a duel role as her father.

Now that you know how weirdly into baseball players I am, I'm just going to stop here and if you want to read my latest blog post you can do so here and until next time!

XOXO 

Ashley

P.S. I know you're all dying to see one of my famous cat pictures but special circumstances have led to this weeks end photo being my nephew Dj whom I know most of you are familiar with. So here's the cute face of my pride and joy for the world to enjoy.

Coming Back Strong

A happy belated birthday to my nephew

I think I might have made a friend, it all started with sitting next to someone random in my Philosophy class and then he asked me a question and I answered him AND THEN he fist bumped me. Now this has never happened to me with a stranger before, it rarely happens with people I'm fairly acquainted with. I like to sit on the outside of a row because Delilah decides when I need to go to the bathroom. So when I went into class this week I sat in the only empty last row seat and I happened to sit next to the same guy. We chatted and it turned out he went to high school with people I had previously gone to school with. Our friendship hasn't been defined and I don't even know if he knows my name but it's the best I've done in three semesters.

I LOVE being back at school! I know I complain about being tired all the time and I may not look very happy but it feels really good to live a life outside of work and my room. I'm doing really well in all of my classes but I'm surprisingly doing better in Philosophy than Psychology. I really thought I was going to do better in Psychology because it's full of more definite information. There is more facts and certain research rather than Philosophy which is full of questions and questions questioning those questions. Once there is an answer with factual evidence and justified truth it's not really Philosophy anymore. I think I'm doing so well because I've always questioned everything. My poor mom has put up with 20 years of me questioning everything she ever did or said. Both of the classes are really interesting so I highly recommend both of them. I really enjoy classes that present challenges and make you think long after you've left class. After school I always call my sister and ask her what how she feels about certain things I've learned day and what she thinks. I like to hear the perspectives from outside of the classroom and I think it really helps me understand and comprehend the information better.

I literally cry all the time because
he is so cute

A quick update on me and the baby is that we are literally perfect. I'm not acting full of myself again...my doctor has only been using those words to describe our progress and he's been very impressed with how well I'm doing. I've had a lot of trouble gaining weight and maintaining any of the weight I have gained but I'm proud to say that I've gained almost 1.5 pounds. It was a lot of hard work and A LOT of eating to get this far. If anyone ever sees me and wants to buy me chili cheese fries I am more than down (just fyi). 

You can read my last blog post here and until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

Destiny

My cats live by this

The last two days I've come home from work and just gone straight to bed, I'm so exhausted it hurts to keep my eyes open. Most days I have work which is a regular 6 am shift, I'm not the best morning person and sometimes I just glare at people when they try to talk to me. Tuesdays and Thursdays are what I am now referring to as nightmares. I have school then work immediately after, meaning zero rest time. Luckily I enjoy most of my classes so being tired from school doesn't bother me that much. Philosophy and Psychology have made me think deeper thoughts and look into things more. Anthropology has mostly made me want to go to sleep but the seats are too uncomfortable in Forum for that.

It's actually really cool because in all my classes right now we are covering a lot of the same bases and my classes all relate to each other. I've gone over the scientific method and in every single class we've discussed Copernicus and Charles Darwin. I am also an expert on Socrates and his life span, it's 470-399 B.C. by the way. If you ever take a class with Joe White then go to class on the first day with that bit of information and you'll be golden. 

Now I'll refer to the title, because it hasn't been explained or acknowledged it all. Like I think my life is a little harder right now than it should be at 19 but I think that it's my destiny. I think that I needed a push to try harder than I was trying before. And now I have more motivation to keep myself on track because of the little person inside of me. She's kind of helping me grow up and keep myself up and running. I think that was actually a pretty sly way to announce the sex of my baby. Delilah Jai (pronounced "J") will be coming in to this world in June. 




Now that I've thrown that information at you, I'm going to head on out. My last blog post is available here and until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

Know Thyself

"I know that I know nothing" - Socrates

SBCC's sunrise is my favorite view

I'm hoping everyone is enjoying their time back at school and getting all of their homework done. I've surprisingly been able to keep up with my school work but that means I'm a bit behind on my sleep. At this moment I'm hoping my doctor doesn't read this and I want all of you to promise you're not going to tell him. This semester I'm taking some really interesting classes and even though I've only been at school for two days I'm really excited for the things I get to do this semester. I'm taking psychology, anthropology, and philosophy on campus Tuesdays and Thursdays, and Marketing and Library 101 online. If you see me on campus you can say hi to me and I'll probably ignore you or make you feel awkward and then walk away but feel free to try anyway. 

First day jitters and I stumbled upon this

I know it's only the first week of classes but I've managed to stay on top of things and even get 100% on a couple of my quizzes. Although my schedule between work and school is ridiculous right now, I think that I am going to do a good job keeping up and getting good grades. With new additions coming into my life I really want to kick it up a notch to show myself what I'm capable of . And to especially show those who told me that I couldn't do it that I can still go above the expectations I had originally set for myself. 

This is the first semester where I have had classes with 100+ people in it, it's actually comforting in a way because I am the worst with class participation and now there are like at least 80 people who will add to the discussion so I don't have to. I know that I keep saying that I'm going to try and make friends but honestly most of my friends are the people I met in kindergarten. 

They're in love with each other

I included a little quote from Socrates that we discussed in my Philosophy class today. This is the first teacher that I've ever had to teach me that I'm actually stupid and ignorant and I don't really know anything. It made me feel better, in a weird way, that this professor is kind of starting us off with the reassurance that we don't need to know it all and that just takes so much pressure off of your shoulders.  I'm sorry this post is such a jumbled mess, I wanted to include everything without an overwhelming amount of information. Once again I'm just really excited to be back at school and doing the things I enjoy even if it means I'm never going to sleep again. This is only my second post of the semester so hang tight for all the fun stuff to come! Catch up on last weeks post here and until next time!

XOXO

Ashley

Here It Is Part 3

My name is Ashley and unlike my first semester here at Santa Barbara City College no one calls me princess anymore. I’ve shifted too far into adulthood to be spoiled by my parents and I pay my own bills now. Since last spring I am a whole new me, I got a promotion at work, I turned 19, I got a new cat, I took a semester off of school, I am becoming a mom (not quite done yet), and I live in a parentless household. If you’ve never read any of my blogs then you probably are confused on why these normal  things are a big deal to me. I am an adult by the law and I’m not quite sure why growing up is mandatory but it is, it’s also something I haven’t been too good at. I’ve been trying to focus on staying focused since I started college but obviously I haven’t been as focused as I’d like to be since there is an extra person living inside of me. I am open to taking on challenges and I know that I can get through some of the rougher things on my own. But don’t let this serious adult business make you think that I am no longer the fun loving awkward girl with cats, because I totally still am. And to end this long paragraph I’d to introduce you all to Lamborghini Mercy. She's a spunky little kitten who is overall well behaved but thinks its funny to steal things and give them new homes.

My main focus this semester is getting the rest of my general ed done so I can start focusing on what I'm doing with my life. I honestly have no idea what direction I'm heading in but I'm hoping that making myself finally grow up will help me make a decision in what I want to pursue. I'm really glad that I have my family to help me out and I think something everyone needs is a good support system, whether it's your family, your friends, your professors, or your colleagues. I wouldn't be anywhere without my mom's nagging or the minimum of ten phone calls I get from my sister daily, or my grandparents texting me every week to tell me they love me and making sure I'm okay. (Quick shoutout to Grandma Kim and Grandpa Monty for keeping it real). I'm really looking forward to being back in school and being an active person on campus and in the internet blogging community. A quick side note is that taking a semester off was probably the worst decision I've ever made. I got bored too quickly and I actually missed doing homework. Just in case you're considering it, I would highly suggest really evaluating all the pros and cons that go with it. School is something I thought I could live without but now I know that this is where I belong for the time being.

This semester is definitely going to be an adventure and I hope all of you will continue to read along with my exciting new journeys. This semester you'll get to hear all about my new classes, adaption into school life, juggling my responsibilities, and of course my new cat. If you want to get to know me a little better you can look back at my Fall 2014 semester or my Spring 2016 semester. I know that I've been blogging for quite a while and you would think that by now I would know how to end one of these things but here's another picture of my cat.

Mercy doesn't like when I do homework
instead of petting her

Until next time!

XOXO

Ashley